I think the most difficult endings are the ones where it’s clear. It was completely your fault that our relationship didn’t make it. It’s clear you’ve f*cked up. And there are some mistakes you make you can’t take back. There are some things “sorry” just can’t fix. There are some relationships that just will never ever be revived.
And you’re left to move forward or hone on it or try and grow from the experience.
1. I bet you feel regret.
You’re probably left tossing and turning at night and thinking back to every memory. You replay in your mind that moment that changed everything. It was the look in his eyes where you knew he saw you differently. If life could give you a remote you’d push rewind and not make the same mistake.
Sometimes fixing something that is already like broken glass only leaves your fingers cut up in an attempt to put it back together. Because the truth is, it will never look the same as it did before.
2. I bet you’re hurt.
Whatever might have happened, it’s never just one person that’s hurt. You feel pain for hurting someone who would never do the same. You feel guilty for messing up in the first place.
But none of us are perfect.
3. Don’t be too hard on yourself.
I swear to you whatever happens or doesn’t happen… it’s gonna be okay. Breakups have a way of making it seem like your world is crashing right in front of your eyes and you can’t fix it. But remember you’re human and you’re bound to make these mistakes.
4. Remember fuck ups are an opportunity for growth.
You won’t always get a second chance. But this is an opportunity at a second chance of being a better person than you were. You’re at a crossroads right now and you can stay on this path or change and learn from this experience.
We learn from every experience but more so the bad experiences are the ones that shape us.
To become the best version of you comes with trial and error. It means letting others down and hurting even the people we love. But love has a way of bringing people back together when you least expect it.
So for now, just try and be a better person and learn from this. Hold onto faith that ’s enough. Trying to be better is all anyone can ask of you.
And the fact you’re taking responsibility for this means you’ve already taken that first step.